


what can’t have room to happen

by petasos



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Canon Compliant, First Kiss, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:15:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25369726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/petasos/pseuds/petasos
Summary: “Actually, I have a proposition for you.”“A proposition?”“Yes. I’d like you to kiss me.”
Relationships: Armin Arlert/Jean Kirstein
Comments: 7
Kudos: 82





	what can’t have room to happen

**Author's Note:**

> title from "the nuisance" by marge piercy.
> 
> hi, this is my first snk fic on here! i've been writing (read: roleplaying) with a friend on discord (hey if you read this you know who you are) and we have an extensive jean/armin thread written out on there (it's like 80k and counting), and it goes literally nothing like what i just wrote! i'm just mentioning it as a shout-out to my friend.
> 
> i just wanted to try writing something 'cause it's jearmin week on tumblr, and while this doesn't fit with the prompt for today (or tomorrow for that matter)... i enjoyed writing it and putting off the other fic i'm writing! and it's my first time writing jean, so. y'know. good luck @ me.
> 
> feel free to come talk to me @ petasos on tumblr!

In the end, Armin had weighed out the options carefully before deciding on Jean. If asked, he couldn’t really label why he’d decided Jean was the best choice here - maybe it was the conversation they’d had in the trees earlier that day, maybe it was the structure of Jean’s face or the way his hands looked when he cleaned his gear.

Maybe it was the fact that Armin had a feeling Jean wouldn’t judge him for it.

Either way, come afternoon, they’d be on their way to Stohess to confront Annie. Chances were high that something would go wrong, that Armin’s hunch might prove incorrect; if something happened, after the day they had, Armin wanted to look back on the life he’d lived with less regrets than he currently had.

Pulling Jean aside after the meeting with the commander hadn’t been hard; Sasha, Bertholdt, Reiner, and Connie were already wandering off towards a late dinner, Ymir and Historia holding hands and chattering quietly. Jean held back anyways, and Armin wondered briefly if he was regretting agreeing to play Eren’s stand-in.

“Can we take a walk?” Armin asked, and Jean gave him a strange look, like he was expecting Armin to question or interrogate him.

“Sure,” Jean replied, voice quiet.

Armin nodded slightly at that, rubbing at the back of his neck for a moment before moving away from him. “Outside,” he said, despite that they probably weren’t even _allowed_ to go outside this late, but breaking one rule the night before something this important probably wasn’t a big deal. So he turned, heading for the door.

People had died that morning - and more might die tomorrow, and the tomorrows after, if they weren’t careful. The look on Jean’s face, his shoulders slightly tense, gave Armin a vague idea that he was thinking roughly the same thing.

“So,” Jean said, once Armin had unlocked the door and they’d both stepped into the cool night air. Armin stared down at the cobblestones beneath their feet, the grass poking through. “Did you want to talk, or did you just want to walk around with me? I’m not complaining -”

“Actually, I have a proposition for you.” Armin briefly thanked the walls that his voice didn’t stutter. He scraped his hair from his face, tucked it behind his ear as he looks up at Jean, steadily keeping his gaze.

“A proposition?”

“Yes. I’d like you to kiss me.”

Jean’s eyes broke away from Armin’s, stopping mid-stride. “I’m sorry?”

“I said, I’d like you to kiss me,” Armin replied, and pressed his hands against his thighs. “I considered asking -”

“No, I heard you the first time. You want to kiss me? Is this a joke? Is - is Jaeger waiting behind one of those pillars?” Jean’s brow furrowed, scratching at the side of his face, just below his ear.

Armin shook his head, turning his gaze away from Jean’s face and glancing around the courtyard. It was quiet, aside from them - aside from the sound of Armin’s heart beating so loudly that he was half-surprised Jean hadn’t commented on it. The horses were asleep in their stables, everyone off having dinner (and likely drinking to ignore how shitty the past day was.)

“No. Eren doesn’t know I’m here.”

Which was true. Eren was probably talking to Mikasa, or maybe Captain Levi, his face knit together in confusion from the idea that Annie might be the Female Titan. _Might_ … she probably was. Definitely was. The idea made Armin’s stomach clench, his chest feel a bit tighter than usual.

He barely knew Annie, but he’d admired her skill and prowess, her ability to end up in the Military Police. She’d helped out Eren with his hand-to-hand skills, and Armin had a feeling Eren would have developed a crush if his head wasn’t so ridiculously stuck on killing every titan out there.

“He doesn’t?” Jean asked, finally breaking the silence between them. “Why me? Why not ask him or something? Do you often go around asking people to kiss you?”

Armin’s face reddened. “No, I don’t. I’ve... never actually kissed anyone before, and I'd like to see what it's like. I considered asking Eren, but he’s my best friend. I also considered asking Connie, but I think he’d laugh at me. Reiner and Bertholdt aren’t options, given I think they’re sleeping together -”

“You think they’re _what_?”

“Oh,” Armin said, and laughed awkwardly. “I could be wrong, but they are rather close.”

“So, by that logic, you’re sleeping with Jaeger.”

Armin frowned up at Jean. “No, it’s - it’s just a hunch, alright? It doesn’t really matter. Anyways, you’re the best option here.”

“Why not Sasha or Mikasa?”

“I’m... not into women.” _And I'd prefer my first kiss to be someone I'm attracted to._

Jean nodded at that. “What makes you think I’m into men?”

Armin didn’t want to bring up Marco, so he ignored the question. Honestly, he had no idea if Marco and Jean had ever gotten past solely being friends; he knew Marco had a crush on Jean, knew from the culminated hours spent cleaning his gear with him. Jean was handsome, and even back in training Armin couldn’t disagree with that. Now, in the proper Survey Corps uniform, he looked… honestly, he looked better than just ‘handsome.’

Marco, he thought, would’ve found him quite attractive like this.

“Aren’t you?” Armin finally asked, one brow raised.

“Well, yeah, I am. S’not like it’s a bad thing. Still, dunno where you got that idea.” Jean paused, then laughed, like he’d mentally come up with some joke in the few seconds before. “Oh, it’s 'cause you think me and Marco had something, right?”

“Um.”

“Well, we didn’t.” Jean turned away from him, continuing their walk, and Armin mentally chided himself for forgetting that’s why they’d come out here. “Look, Arlert -”

“You can call me Armin, you know.”

“Well… yeah, I know.” Jean’s gaze flickered back to Armin’s face. “Why me?”

Armin’s face could probably heat up the entire building with how hot it was, and he was quite certain Jean could tell. “You’re good with ODM gear, you’re attractive, and you’re… not bad to converse with. I could list off other reasons, if you want, but those are the main ones.”

“You want to kiss me because I’m good with ODM gear?”

“Well, when you put it like _that_ ,” Armin said, and smiled rather nervously up at him. “It’s mainly the latter two.”

“But that one’s still on there. What, you got a fetish for ODM gear or something? Walls, Armin, I didn’t think you had it in you.” Jean snickered, which made the air feel a little less tense. “Is it the leather? It’s the leather, isn’t it?”

“No!”

“It is!”

“It’s not! It’s just - well, you’re -”

“I’m what?”

Armin paused in his steps, turning towards Jean, quite sure he was about to sputter over his words if he didn’t choose them very carefully. “You’re very… agile. And using the gear means you’re probably good with your hands.”

Jean stared blankly at him for a second. With the moon bearing down on them, almost completely round, he could almost see the red tinge to Jean’s face. “You’re not asking me to…”

“No! No, I’m - I just want you to kiss me!”

“Alright,” said Jean, leaning down, and Armin almost had a panic attack right then and there. Jean brought his hands up, placing one on either side of Armin’s face, brown eyes studying Armin’s face the same way Armin studied old strategies. “You’re not so bad on the eyes yourself, you know.”

“Thank you,” Armin replied, without really thinking. “I think?”

Jean was very, very close. Armin briefly wondered if they’d ever really been this close before, but he couldn’t figure out if they had or not. Probably not. Jean’s eyes, dark brown, seemed to glow intently for a moment, right before he leaned in.

Kissing, it turned out, was _not_ exactly what Armin had expected. Jean’s mouth meshed to his, chapped lips against Armin’s. Armin’s hands hovered in the air for a moment before settling against Jean’s chest, his lips parting slightly. It wasn’t bad, per say. It just wasn’t what he’d expected.

Armin closed his eyes, leaning up into it. Maybe if he tilted his head...

Jean pulled back, wiping off his mouth. “Was that bad?”

“Um,” said Armin, quite eloquently. “No, it wasn’t. I mean, if I was a scientist, I’d kiss you again just to be sure - hypothesis, and all - but -”

“Then kiss me again,” said Jean, and his voice was slightly strained, like he was holding back a sigh or a laugh or other words.

Armin couldn’t exactly deny that suggestion. He leaned up on his tiptoes, pressing his mouth to Jean’s again. Jean’s hands were still on his face, palms warm against his cheeks, but one slid into Armin’s hair with ease, fingers threading through the locks.

Armin made a pleased noise into Jean’s mouth at that, tilting his head to kiss Jean more intently. Jean moved, pressing forward, and Armin stumbled backwards to accommodate, smiling despite himself when he pulled back.

“Was that bad?” he asked, a direct echo of Jean’s previous question.

“No,” Jean said, very quietly, like he was scared someone might hear the admission. “Well, now you can say you’ve kissed or been kissed or whatever twice, right?”

“Right,” Armin said, and his stomach felt like someone had dumped an entire garden’s worth of butterflies into it. “Right, I can.” A pause. “Thank you.”

Hadn’t he already thanked him? Probably. Not like it mattered.

“I wouldn’t… mind kissing you again,” Jean said, the words coming out honey-thick and slower than molasses, and Armin blushed harder at that. “I mean, maybe not right _now_ -”

“Really?”

“Yeah. Sure,” Jean replied, and shrugged. “It’s a little late, though.”

Eyes downcast, Armin nodded at that. For a brief moment, he considered asking Jean to stay out here with him regardless, but it was also growing colder by the moment, and being inside and in his bunk didn’t seem so bad. Getting dinner also didn’t seem so bad; they’d need their energy for tomorrow, for confronting Annie.

 _Confronting Annie_ … the thought proved discomforting, and Armin shivered slightly, rubbing at the fabric on his arm. “Yes, it is. We should head back inside.”

“Yeah,” said Jean, turning away from him. “I mean, I’m _starving_.”

Tomorrow, Armin thought, would probably go horribly wrong - but walking back to the mess hall with Jean, his shoulder brushing against Jean’s arm occasionally, wasn’t horrible in the slightest.


End file.
